This is damn hilarious. It's such an accurate portrayal of Russian English. Mind you, it's a deliberate attempt to make a region taste as vodka of russia. - herrick's attempt ^^
"Tsar dictates me not to permit that you are passing."
"Now I must to prepare the edibles. I am hard-working as to buzzing bee."
"Yoy, I am so empty! I hope the time is not lingering until next nourishment."
"But first you must to become beefy by battling nearby to town. I mind that this is intelligent."
"I'm happy to see that you are returned."
downright retarded and yet never fails to give me that warm smile.
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